Top Ten Reasons I’m Neither a Liberal Nor a Conservative:
<p>I&#8217;m reposting this screed from 2002 because it&#8217;s no longer visible on the Web, and in the near future I expect to post some things that will get me accused of right-wing bias.</p>
<p>Top Ten Reasons I&#8217;m Not A (Left-)Liberal:</p>
<ol>
<li>Gun control.  Liberals are completely wrong about this.  A fair number<br />
of them know better, too, but they sponsor lies about it as a form of class<br />
warfare against conservative-leaning gun owners.</li>
<li>Nuclear power.  They&#8217;re wrong about this, too, and the cost in<br />
both dollars and human deaths by pollution and other fossil-fuel<br />
side-effects has been enormous.</li>
<li>Affirmative action.  These programs couldn&#8217;t be a more diabolical or<br />
effective plan for plan for entrenching racial prejudice if the Aryan<br />
Nations had designed them.</li>
<li>Abortion: The liberals&#8217; looney-toon feminist need to believe that<br />
a fetus one second before birth is a parasitic lump of tissue with no<br />
rights, but a fetus one second afterwards is a full human, has done<br />
half the job of making a reasoned debate on abortion<br />
nigh-impossible.</li>
<li>Communism.  I haven&#8217;t forgiven the Left for sucking up to the monstrous<br />
evil that was the Soviet Union.  And I never will.</li>
<li>Socialism.  Liberals have never met a tax, a government<br />
intervention, or a forcible redistribution of wealth they didn&#8217;t like.<br />
Their economic program is Communism without the guts to admit it.</li>
<li>Junk science. No medical study is too bogus and no environmental<br />
scare too fraudalent for liberals.  If it rationalizes bashing<br />
capitalism or slathering on another layer of regulatory bureaucracy,<br />
they&#8217;ll take it.</li>
<li>Defining deviancy down. Liberals are in such a desperate rush to<br />
embrace the `victimized by society&#8217; and speak the language of<br />
compassion that they&#8217;ve forgotten how to condemn harmful,<br />
self-destructive and other-destructive behavior.</li>
<li>William Jefferson Clinton.  Sociopathic liar, perjurer, sexual predator.<br />
There was nothing but a sucking narcissistic vacuum where his principles<br />
should have been.  Liberals worship him.</li>
<li>Liberals, by and large, are fools.</li>
</ol>
<p>Top Ten Reasons I&#8217;m Not A Conservative:</p>
<ol>
<li>Pornography. The complete absence of evidence that exposure to<br />
sexually-explicit material is harmful to children or anyone else doesn&#8217;t<br />
stop conservatives from advocating massive censorship.</li>
<li>Drugs.  We found out that Prohibition was a bad idea back in the<br />
1930s &#8212; all it did was create a huge and virulent criminal class, erode<br />
respect for the law, and corrupt our politics.  Some people never learn.</li>
<li>Creationism.  I don&#8217;t know who I find more revolting, the drooling<br />
morons who actally believe creationism or the intelligent panderers<br />
who know better but provide them with political cover for their<br />
religious-fundamentalist agenda in return for votes.</li>
<li>Abortion.  The conservatives&#8217; looney-toon religious need to<br />
believe that a fertilized gamete is morally equivalent to a human<br />
being has done the other half of making a reasoned debate on abortion<br />
nigh-impossible.</li>
<li>Racism.  I haven&#8217;t forgiven the Right for segregation, Jim Crow laws,<br />
and lynching blacks.  And I never will.</li>
<li>Sexism.  Way too much conservative thought still reads like an<br />
apologia for keeping women barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen.</li>
<li>Anti-science. Stem cells, therapeutic cloning &#8212; it doesn&#8217;t matter<br />
how many more diabetes, cancer and AIDS patients have to die to<br />
protect the anti-abortion movement&#8217;s ideological flanks.  Knowledge &#8212;<br />
who needs it?  Conservatives would try suppressing <em>astronomy</em><br />
if the telescope had just been invented.</li>
<li>Family values.  Conservatives are so desperate to reassert the<br />
repressive `normalcy&#8217; they think existed in Grand-dad&#8217;s time that they<br />
pretend we can undo the effects of the automobile, television, the<br />
Pill, and the Internet.</li>
<li>Ronald Wilson Reagan.  A B-movie actor who thought ketchup was<br />
a vegetable.  His grip on reality was so dangerously weak that the<br />
Alzheimer&#8217;s made no perceptible difference.  Conservatives worship him.</li>
<li>Conservatives, by and large, are villains.</li>
</ol>