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The Smartphone Wars: Oracle lawsuit’s final fizzle
<p>OK, this is just weird. <a href="http://www.computerworld.com/s/article/9228298/Oracle_agrees_to_zero_damages_in_Google_lawsuit_eyes_appeal">&#8220;Oracle agrees to &#8216;zero&#8217; damages in Google lawsuit, eyes appeal&#8221;</a> That vast lawsuit that, according to some idiots (including a few of my commenters), was going to destroy Android and sow the earth with salt in its wake? It&#8217;s done &#8211; but in a bizarre way that makes me question the sanity of Oracle&#8217;s lawyers at Boies Schiller.</p>
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<p>My regulars will recall that I&#8217;ve been saying this lawsuit was doomed since day one, a bad joke. Nor was I just handwaving; happens I&#8217;m intimately familiar with the case law in this area, because I&#8217;ve been involved in a lawsuit with a similar fact pattern. I expected it to end with a whimper, but&#8230;Oracle stipulating to zero damages <em>so they can get on with the appeal</em>? </p>
<p>Ow. My head hurts. What are they thinking they can win on appeal once they&#8217;ve conceded that the value of Google&#8217;s putative infringement was zero? I suppose it&#8217;s possible that they&#8217;re trying for an appellate ruling that their APIs are indeed copyrightable so they can use it as a competitive weapon against someone else other than Google, but that&#8217;s an extremely unlikely outcome. Alsup&#8217;s finding is as near bulletproof as they get &#8211; well reasoned, well written, and a very conservative extension of the <em>Altai</em> ruling.</p>
<p>I can&#8217;t make any sense of what Oracle is doing. My wife the attorney can&#8217;t make any sense of it. And Judge Alsup apparently can&#8217;t either &#8211; when both parties agreed to an assessment of zero damages, he asked &#8220;Is there a catch I need to be aware of?&#8221;</p>
<p>I dunno, maybe Boies Schiller is huffing the same glue they were during the SCO lawsuit. It&#8217;s either that or they&#8217;ve got video of the appellate judge buggering a goat. You choose.</p>